


A Bet between Old Friends

by GenuineSnoof



Series: The Retired Adventurer [2]
Category: X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Attempt at Seduction by Toy, Established Relationship, Fluff and Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-17
Updated: 2018-01-17
Packaged: 2019-03-06 06:12:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13405137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GenuineSnoof/pseuds/GenuineSnoof
Summary: "Sir Foxtrot, I think you're trying to seduce me!"





	A Bet between Old Friends

Erik was pouring himself a glass of whiskey when he heard the sudden voice in his head. It was obviously Charles, but he made his voce sound much higher and even posher than usually.

"Mr Erik? Can you hear me?"

"Uh... yes?" Erik thought.

"Heureka! It worked! I am a genius!"

"Yes..." Erik frowned in an amused grimace and put his glass down. "Schn-"

"We mustn't tell Master Charles," Charles' high-pitched voice cut Erik's thoughts off. "Meet me in the study."

"Right," Erik said out loud and turned to the stairs.

"You haven't known Master Charles for as long as I have," said the high voice in his head. "He is a most jealous human."

"Mutant," Erk thought.

"Tailless creature."

Erik snorfled.

He reached Charles' study, pushed open the door and swallowed a laugh, when he saw Sir Foxtrot sitting at Charles' desk, clad in his little tweed outfit and holding a paw to his head. Upon closer inspection, Erik found the paw was taped to the head with clingfilm.

"Come in, close the door," Sir Foxtrot said.

Erik did. "Sir Foxtrot," he said out loud, fighting the urge to look for Charles in the room.

"Master Charles is away on some senseless errand I sent him to. It was't easy to find the perfect moment to reveal my powers to you, but I couldn't bear it any longer. Please, Mr Erik, have a seat."

Erik coughed a little to suppress his laughter and sat down across from Sir Foxrot.

"I didn't know you were a telepath, too," he said.

"No. No one knew. I kept my secret very well. You see, I made Master Charles pick me in the toy store."

"Did you?" Erik nodded, impressed. "Because he looked so cute and schnuggly, I assume."

"Because I sensed his immense power!" Sir Foxtrot declared. "And I knew we were destined for greatness!"

"I see," Erik said. "I hope you won't take this the wrong way, but why didn't you tell anyone where you were all this time you were in the loft, then?"

"I was scheming! Planning! Waiting for my time to come!"

"Of course," Erik nodded.

"But now..." Sir Foxtrot sighed and moved onto the table.

Erik chuckled as Sir Foxtrot moved steadily closer to him as if shoved by an invisible hand.

"Now... my goals, my dreams... Everything has changed..."

"Oh?" Erik raised his brows.

"Yes. Oh, I must seem so foolish to you," Sir Foxtrot wailed, "but... to be near you, sleep in the same room as you..."

Erik bowed his head, swallowing a giggle and squeezed his eyes shut briefly.

"You don't understand me," Sir Foxtrot said. "I can see that, but.. oh... my gorgeous human..."

"Sir Foxtrot," Erik said in a very serious voice and looked up at the toy again, "I think you're trying to seduce me."

Suddenly Sir Foxtrot was hovering right in front of Erik's face, so close his nose touched his.  
"Master Charles never needs to know!"

"Sir Foxtrot!" Eik exclaimed and stood up, shoving back his chair. "Your Charles' oldest friend! His best friend!"

"I cannot fight my feelings!" Sir Foxtrot flew close to Erik again. "My desires! You feel it, too, Erik, I know you do! What is Charles to you, anyway!"

Erik took a step back and crossed his arms in front of his chest. "He's the love of my life. No sexy fox could ever replace him!"

"Not even me?" Sir Foxtrot purred. "I'm filthy rich."

"So is Charles."

"And I can be just straight up filthy, too."

Erik smirked. "So can Charles."

Sir Foxtrot paused. hovering in front of Erik. "All right. Is that your last word? Think before you answer. I know things you humans can only dream of."

"Everything you know," Erik said in a sexy purr, "Charles knows, too."

There was the briefest giggle to be heard from behind the couch, then Sir Foxtrot floated back onto the desk. "Well then," he said," I guess that was that. Charles, you can come out now."

Erik turned his head to see Charles stand up behind the couch.

"Did you hear?" Sir Foxtrot asked.

"Everything." Charles grinned. "Told you."

"Yes, yes," Sir Foxtrot grumbled. 

"You owe me two thousand dollars."

"Yes, yes," Sir Foxtrot sighed. "Fucking humans. All saps, the lot of you."

Charles walked over to kiss Erik, who was just shaking his head at him, then said with his nose touching Erik's, "Thanks for winning my bet for me."

"You're a nutcase."

Charles kissed him again, deep , and pressed against him. "I'm nuts about you."

Erik snatched him off his feet and threw him onto the couch, quickly following to pin him down and smooch him senseless.

"Get a room, you two," Sir Foxtrot said.

Erik looked down at Charles, who rolled his eyes. "Sore loser," he said.

"This is your room," Erik said.

"True."

Sir Foxtrot floated up and out the door, which he closed behind himself.

"I want you to know," Charles said, "I never doubted you for a second. Not even when he was trying to kiss you."

Erik smiled softly. "Well, I'm under your spell, mein kleines geisteskrankes Sexküken. I wasn't tempted at all."

Charles stroked Erik's cheek. "You say the sweetest things." He gently pecked Erik on the lips. "I love you. You want me to fuck you till we break through the floor now?"

"Yes please," Erik said. "That sounds lovely."

"I thought so," Charles said and kissed him. 

THE END


End file.
